Tutoyer and vouvoyer: what these French verbs mean

Tutoyer means “to address someone with tu”. Vouvoyer means “to address someone with vous”. These verbs are about the relationship between speakers: close and informal with tu, polite or distant with vous. The practical question is not only which pronoun you use, but whether both people have agreed on the same level of formality.

Tutoyer: moving to tu

Use tutoyer when someone addresses another person with tu. It often marks closeness, youth, friendship, or a decision to be less formal.

Elle tutoie ses amis.
She uses tu with her friends.

If you are unsure, ask before switching:

On peut se tutoyer ?
Can we use tu with each other?

That question is common because switching from vous to tu is social, not just grammatical.

Vouvoyer: keeping vous

Use vouvoyer when someone addresses another person with vous. It can show respect, professional distance, or simple politeness with someone you do not know.

Le serveur vouvoie les clients.
The waiter uses vous with the customers.

Vouvoyer is also normal when one adult speaks to another in a formal setting. It does not mean the relationship is cold; it can simply be polite.

The reflexive forms: se tutoyer and se vouvoyer

When two people use the same form with each other, French often uses the reflexive structure:

Maintenant, nous nous tutoyons.
Now we use tu with each other.

In conversation, the same idea is often said with on:

On se tutoie ?
Shall we use tu with each other?

This is one reason the verbs matter: they let you talk about the social rule without listing every verb ending.

Common mistakes

Thinking tutoyer means “to be friends”

Tutoyer means using tu, not necessarily being close friends. Some workplaces, online spaces, and classes use tu quickly.

On se tutoie au bureau.
We use tu with each other at the office.

Using tu before the switch is clear

If the relationship is formal, wait for an invitation or ask.

Tu peux signer ici ? → Vous pouvez signer ici ?
Can you sign here? (to a client)

Forgetting that vous can be plural

Vouvoyer is about formal vous with one person. A group always takes vous, even if you are not being formal.

Vous venez, les amis ?
Are you coming, friends?

If you need the core pronoun choice first, start with tu vs vous in French. This article gives you the verbs French speakers use to negotiate that choice. Fluera practices the same register shift in short exchanges, so on se tutoie ? and je vous vouvoie feel like real social moves, not dictionary forms. Try it when you practice French.

Practice